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Have you ever heard about body shaming? Maybe yes, you have found a lot of writings or videos on internet about body shaming.
Quoting from a source, the definition of body shaming is the action or practice of humiliating someone by making mocking or critical comments about their body shape or size. I think almost all of us ever got this action even though from the close friends as a joke.
Well, in this time I want to tell a story of body shaming that happened to me. As you know, I am a girl. I got this kind of body shaming when I was in school. The first experience happened in my elementary school life. My guy friends called me with a different name just because I had a different color of hair that most Asians have a black hair. It started when I was in 4th grade, a guy who sat behind me noticed my hair color and then he was the first guy who inspired the other guys to call me with different name. The guys started to relate all things that caused unusual hair color on me. For example, "Ahahaha, don't play kite under the sun, look at your hair color!" and so on.
He also commented on my another part of body. I remember when he said, "Haha you have mustache!". Another guy friend in elementary school said to me, " Oh see, you have a knob tooth!". I also remember I had an eyes problem (Myopia) in 4th grade, but I didn't tell my parents because I was afraid and was not confidence to wear glasses. Until my teacher told my parents about my eyes, and I started using glasses in 6th grade. The guy friends called me "hahaha Betty La Fea!". I felt so bad about myself at that time. All things that I did, all were wrong in their eyes. I lost my self confidence but I kept staying cool. What did I do when they were mocking me? Did I keep in silent? There is no words of "keep calm" in the dictionary of my life if someone mocks me. I fought back with their mocking reply. However, I had to defense myself alone while they were in groups! Can you imagine that?
The next body shaming I got is when I was in junior high school. I suffered dengue fever in 6th grade where I lost my consciousness for a moment. After I had recovered, my body became very thin. Before suffering from dengue fever, I had an average child body size. I forget who was the first time that call me "Bone!". So most guys know that I have a nickname "Bone!". Whenever I met those groups of guys they would call me and shouted "Hahahahaha, hey Bone!". They kept calling me like that until I felt that I was ugly. I ate a lot to gain the weight but nothing happened. I was still a thin girl. I often asked my girl friend, "Hey, am I looking quite fat??" Yeah, I did that because I lost my confidence for several times. But, what did I do? Well, I did the same thing just like when I was in elementary school. I also punched or kicked some guys who tried insulting me.
In senior high school life, I remember it was the computer subject, suddenly my guy friend noticed me "Hey, you have flat nose. You look like Sule! (Indonesian comedian who has a flat nose)". I didn't know how it started but then he announced his big invention to my friends in the class until they called me "Flat nose". In this case, both girl and guy friends called me that. Also my best friends called me that. I was sad and felt a bit worthless at that time. But what did I do? I created a fake smile and laughed like I was okay with it. I think all students knew who I was because I was a famous with that nickname. One day, my guy friend called me with a hurt word ever and I was really angry. I chased him in the class and punched his back until I satisfied. My classmates was stared at me and shocked because of my anger. Hahaha. Well, I was a quite tomboy so I never got afraid of guys. So, whoever tried to mock me, I couldn't stay silent.
I'm quite lucky that in my college life, there is no people especially guys do a body shaming to me straight to the point. But I don't know what they talk behind me, LOL. Even though I don't get the same experience like before, I see a lot of guys or girls still do a body shaming to the girls over the internet. We live in a modern era where people now do cyber bullying with hatred comments and make the victim feel insecure about her/him self. I watched a statement of Kylie Jenner whether it's true or not, that the reason of her to done her lips was just because her boyfriend complained on her small lips as he said that he didn't feel better to kiss small lips. Kylie Jenner felt insecure of herself because her beloved person said that to her and she decided to done her lips.
Even though they mocked me, I still had a lot of friends. A lot of fans though haha. Seriously, a guy ever made me fall in front a staircase intentionally and after that he stared at me in the class, beside he was a person who also mocked me. I think those guys were trying to catch attention from me, but in a poor way HAHAHA. Today, I will try not to care of what people say about my body shape/size. I believe in the words of "Every girl is beautiful on her own way". I hate those guys who just love a girl by her physical appearance. What if people say "But when you are in elementary, they are still kids and it is a natural thing". Hey, how come you let your children do bad things like that to other people? As I ever watched that so many bullying cases ended up with suicide without knowing age. It also depends on her/him own mentality and social support like family, relatives, etc.
So I want to tell you for guys, please never ever do a body shaming to everyone. I don't know but I see body shaming mostly comes to the girls. It is also prevail to the girls not to say hatred words that make other girls feel down. I really know how it feels. Let me tell you, I was really sad when people have a bad comment to my body shape/size, but it makes me improve myself in a better way. Maybe some girls choose to do plastic surgery, fillers, Botox, and some others thing to get more confidence. I think, it is their own business even if I don't agree about that. But maybe they do for some reasons we never know. We should say good to people because we will never know that our words will give a huge impact for someone. Let them have their own life as long as it doesn't harm or give negative effect to people. If they do, try to correct them in a better and a decent way.
I do body shaming as well to my close friends as a joke between us and I think I should stop this. Learning from my experience, most of perpetrators of body shaming are guys! They make joke of girl's body. Hey it isn't funny at all. We both are human, we have self-esteem and need a mutual respect to each other. In the end of this blog, I have nice words:
Treat others like you want to be treated by them because karma does exist.
**I would like you to correct correct my grammar as usual :D **
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